I don't know how He does it.
*Your love is extravagant
Your friendship it is intimate
He is the Lover of my Soul. He is so in tune with my every fear and my every hope and He knows with every detail how they are intertwined. He exposes me to that which draws out the very unknown I only hoped existed. And it does exist because, praise God, the Holy Spirit lives.
Little girls long for adventure. Twirling and playing and dress up aren't evidence that she thinks that's all there is to life. It's evidence she thinks there's more. It's the hope of a brilliant future in a fantastic story that matters deeply to the soul. With beauty and wit and a heart that loves wholly and fearlessly she'll dance her way through a life so full her very core can't be bound.
Admitting that playtime is secret dreaming in role play is something so scary even she won't want to realize it in fear that it's just too good to be true.
I never could have imagined...I look back at my plans I knew I could have achieved. How safe it all was. How empty my life would have been. The plans of the Lord- He who forms the hearts of all, who considers everything they do- stand firm forever, the purposes of his heart through all generations (Psalm 33: 11 & 15) A chosen daughter of the King of kings will not live an ordinary life. It is not that I feel at all like I've achieved anywhere near this out-of-the-ordinary life. It's that I can't tell you one thing about my future and it gives me chills. I can't figure it out. I LOVE how unsatisfied I am with what the world wants me to do. I know He won't let me settle for what so much of my surrounding thinks I need. I need to live and breathe and eat and drink and sleep Jesus Christ. God I don't know how to get where it is you want me to go but
I feel I'm moving to the rhythm of your grace
Your fragrance is intoxicating in the secret place
Clear Lake is heavy on my heart tonight. There are nights when the swelling in my chest is so great I barely know how to stand it. How in the world did I get so lucky? I wish to write about these great people but words seem so insignificant to their impact on my life. Because of my God destined time spent with them, I am forever changed.
Your love is extravagant
Spread wide in the arms of Christ is the love that covers sin
No greater love have I ever known
You consider me a friend
So much of me understands my unworthiness. This is why admitting the dreams means admitting the fears. Unimpactful? Meaningless? Lifeless?
Capture my heart again
But the eyes of the Lord are on those who fear Him, on those whose hope is in his unfailing love, to deliver them from death and keep them alive in famine.
We wait in hope for the Lord; He is our help and our shield.
In Him our hearts rejoice, for we trust in His holy name. May your unfailing love rest upon us, O Lord, even as we put our hope in you. (Psalm 33: 18-22)
Extravagant as defined on Dictionary.com :)
3. exceeding the bounds of reason, as actions, demands, opinions or passions.
4. going beyond what is deserved or justifiable.
Your love truly is extravagant.
I wish. I want. I always have. Change my heart O God to desire the things you desire. Guide me. Take me to where you want me to be, lead me to those places. Because I could never be so happy, I've never been as happy, as when I am surrounded by the purpose and will of the King. To make you happy, to make you proud, to Love and to be in your Love, that is a dream come true.
*Casting Crowns - Your Love is Extravagant
Tuesday, October 27, 2009
Friday, October 23, 2009
Happy Sounds.
Michael Buble.
Crazy Love
Everything
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KeKtB2EhdaE
Owl City.
Dear Vienna
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fxGNhchIx1M
Hello Seattle
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=efri_kouyDM
Fireflies
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aI4JLa0hbUw
:)
Haven't Met You Yet
Crazy Love
Everything
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KeKtB2EhdaE
Owl City.
Dear Vienna
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fxGNhchIx1M
Hello Seattle
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=efri_kouyDM
Fireflies
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aI4JLa0hbUw
:)
Monday, October 19, 2009
"Hold it Tight and You Won't Have Any'"
Today I drove.
and drove and drove.
I left Abilene. It was freeing.
Then I had to be realistic and remember that it's Monday and I had somewhere to be in 2 hours and that I don't have the money to be driving out of town like I did. So I turned around and came back.
But...I loved the drive. Very Texas but very home. I always feel God so easily when there is nothing but open road and open fields and sky in front. It seems so easy to come back to the heart of things. Simplicity. And let's be real, Phil Wickham makes it even more relaxing.
When I got back into town I sat at the park by the zoo for a while watching the ducks. No Phil this time, just silence. Seemed to be all I needed to listen.
Went and picked up food at Sharky's afterward. Such an interesting place. Escaping Abilene to breathe a little with God and then come to Sharky's and He's there too.
He's in people like the Conwells. Mr. Conwell was at a table talking to some college kids (I'm assuming) and it didn't quite look like small talk. I wish I could've heard what they were talking about. Then his wife comes in and the college kids leave and he gives the same attention to her as he did to them. Every week I see the two of them there eating together. And they TALK during their meal. And listen. A lot of connecting going on at Sharky's.
Then you have people who can't remember if they shuffled the dominos spending time together because it matters. With open arms they welcome anyone and everyone in and laugh with them and share what it is they are a part of.
Sharing with others, sharing with God. These are the things that make the worst of days the best.
My elementary school teachers couldn't have sung it better :)
Love is something if you give it away, give it away, give it away;
Love is something if you give it away, it comes right back to you.
Love is like a lucky penny, hold it tight and you won't have any;
Give it away, and you'll have plenty, It comes right back to you.
and drove and drove.
I left Abilene. It was freeing.
Then I had to be realistic and remember that it's Monday and I had somewhere to be in 2 hours and that I don't have the money to be driving out of town like I did. So I turned around and came back.
But...I loved the drive. Very Texas but very home. I always feel God so easily when there is nothing but open road and open fields and sky in front. It seems so easy to come back to the heart of things. Simplicity. And let's be real, Phil Wickham makes it even more relaxing.
When I got back into town I sat at the park by the zoo for a while watching the ducks. No Phil this time, just silence. Seemed to be all I needed to listen.
Went and picked up food at Sharky's afterward. Such an interesting place. Escaping Abilene to breathe a little with God and then come to Sharky's and He's there too.
He's in people like the Conwells. Mr. Conwell was at a table talking to some college kids (I'm assuming) and it didn't quite look like small talk. I wish I could've heard what they were talking about. Then his wife comes in and the college kids leave and he gives the same attention to her as he did to them. Every week I see the two of them there eating together. And they TALK during their meal. And listen. A lot of connecting going on at Sharky's.
Then you have people who can't remember if they shuffled the dominos spending time together because it matters. With open arms they welcome anyone and everyone in and laugh with them and share what it is they are a part of.
Sharing with others, sharing with God. These are the things that make the worst of days the best.
My elementary school teachers couldn't have sung it better :)
Love is something if you give it away, give it away, give it away;
Love is something if you give it away, it comes right back to you.
Love is like a lucky penny, hold it tight and you won't have any;
Give it away, and you'll have plenty, It comes right back to you.
Tuesday, October 6, 2009
One Perspective.
I entered the kitchen only far enough to see her peering behind Wes at the stove. She was a little black girl who waved back with a shy smile after my excited attempt to connect. It's not that the other people in the room weren't important, for they very much were..and are. Wes is one of the college aged guys living at the house on Cockerell Drive. Kyle, a friend I met through Clear Lake Church of Christ (a whole 'nother story in itself), is temporarily living there until he can get a place with his friend Marshall on the south side of town. You see, I wouldn't have ever been there had it not been for these two. So, like I said, they are in fact important. I suppose it's more that I don't quite understand my place with them yet that it was so easy for me to be drawn to her. I went around and in through the other doorway to sit next to her at the kitchen table.
I suppose I didn't want to impose so I began to take out some homework I had brought with me.
"What's your name?" I started with.
"Alina."
"I'm Candice."
I'm sure I asked her some questions desiring to break the ice, but I'm positive we both still felt awkward. I decided to let it alone. Kyle, busy making the tortillas, asked me a few questions to make me feel welcomed which I appreciated. Wes shook my hand and we all engaged in some light conversation. Ben came in, whose hand I also shook, and I took a backseat to glance at my homework but mostly to watch the roommates interact. I'm not sure when it happened exactly but I know she left the room to check out what the other two roommates, Josh and Aaron, were up to. (I had met these two when they let me in the house earlier.)
I remember feeling relieved that, right as I was clearing my homework so the boys could eat at the table, Ainsley arrived. I got up to greet her and we decided to start working on our question box she brought. This is a box that girls from where we work can put anonymous questions in for us to attempt to answer. We just so happened to work on the couch Alina was now sitting at as I asked her if she wanted to help. Silently excited we'd want her help, she agreed.
Let's just say the box didn't look like what I pictured, but I'm so glad. With her opinions and handiwork involved, it looked better than I could've imagined.
While we worked on the box we listened to the roommates, which was pretty funny. Apparently I need to watch Fiddler on the Roof, which I hope we follow through with. We used all their tape. And Moo Moo, Alina's brother, arrived.
The 11 year old's initial excitement to be there quickly faded when he realized there were new people and that meal time was keeping the boys busy. After several minutes of watching him watch us make the box, I asked if he knew any card games. By now the boys had scattered again from the kitchen. Kyle, who had just finished cleaning up, caught the end of our conversation. Moo Moo, Kyle, Ainsley, and I all decided to play Egyptian Rat Screw. Alina, next to me and Ainsley, watched intently.
After one game the timid sixth grade boy had transformed into quite the competitor. Games two and three were moved to the kitchen table for better reaching and slapping purposes. Alina joined in these rounds.
Naturally, since the mood was right from us all getting pumped up from the game- the next move was to time Moo Moo shove a banana into his mouth. 1 minute, 9 seconds.
During the game, three more older kids arrived; one being a brother of the two present siblings. He was our audience for game three.
With more commotion in the house now, we all split to check it out. Ainsley and I finished up the question box, but of course not far behind came Alina wanting to help finish.
Wondering what to do next, Alina asked about the balloons she had seen in my car. I explained we were going to release them in the sky to honor a little baby boy born stillborn the week before. When I asked if she wanted to help, she didn't hesitate.
We took the balloons to the park to release them and Moo Moo followed. I let Alina keep the red heart balloon and we watched the rest rise higher and higher into the atmosphere. A still moment calmed my heart as I wondered the complexities of the "why"s in this world. Of course, on the way back, Moo Moo and I raced since Alina didn't wish to participate in order to protect her balloon.
Catching our breaths, I teased Moo Moo by announcing to Kyle, now in the garage working on bikes, that I won...an obvious lie. Moo Moo, now full of energy, gladly volunteered when Kyle asked for some help on the bikes- that he may or may not have really needed.
The saddest part of my day was in that garage when I realized my time at the blessed home was now up. We gathered our things and said our goodbyes.
Ainsley and I, beaming, said with pure joy in our voices, "I'm so glad we came." We never stopped smiling the whole way back to our cars, and probably a good while after.
I suppose I didn't want to impose so I began to take out some homework I had brought with me.
"What's your name?" I started with.
"Alina."
"I'm Candice."
I'm sure I asked her some questions desiring to break the ice, but I'm positive we both still felt awkward. I decided to let it alone. Kyle, busy making the tortillas, asked me a few questions to make me feel welcomed which I appreciated. Wes shook my hand and we all engaged in some light conversation. Ben came in, whose hand I also shook, and I took a backseat to glance at my homework but mostly to watch the roommates interact. I'm not sure when it happened exactly but I know she left the room to check out what the other two roommates, Josh and Aaron, were up to. (I had met these two when they let me in the house earlier.)
I remember feeling relieved that, right as I was clearing my homework so the boys could eat at the table, Ainsley arrived. I got up to greet her and we decided to start working on our question box she brought. This is a box that girls from where we work can put anonymous questions in for us to attempt to answer. We just so happened to work on the couch Alina was now sitting at as I asked her if she wanted to help. Silently excited we'd want her help, she agreed.
Let's just say the box didn't look like what I pictured, but I'm so glad. With her opinions and handiwork involved, it looked better than I could've imagined.
While we worked on the box we listened to the roommates, which was pretty funny. Apparently I need to watch Fiddler on the Roof, which I hope we follow through with. We used all their tape. And Moo Moo, Alina's brother, arrived.
The 11 year old's initial excitement to be there quickly faded when he realized there were new people and that meal time was keeping the boys busy. After several minutes of watching him watch us make the box, I asked if he knew any card games. By now the boys had scattered again from the kitchen. Kyle, who had just finished cleaning up, caught the end of our conversation. Moo Moo, Kyle, Ainsley, and I all decided to play Egyptian Rat Screw. Alina, next to me and Ainsley, watched intently.
After one game the timid sixth grade boy had transformed into quite the competitor. Games two and three were moved to the kitchen table for better reaching and slapping purposes. Alina joined in these rounds.
Naturally, since the mood was right from us all getting pumped up from the game- the next move was to time Moo Moo shove a banana into his mouth. 1 minute, 9 seconds.
During the game, three more older kids arrived; one being a brother of the two present siblings. He was our audience for game three.
With more commotion in the house now, we all split to check it out. Ainsley and I finished up the question box, but of course not far behind came Alina wanting to help finish.
Wondering what to do next, Alina asked about the balloons she had seen in my car. I explained we were going to release them in the sky to honor a little baby boy born stillborn the week before. When I asked if she wanted to help, she didn't hesitate.
We took the balloons to the park to release them and Moo Moo followed. I let Alina keep the red heart balloon and we watched the rest rise higher and higher into the atmosphere. A still moment calmed my heart as I wondered the complexities of the "why"s in this world. Of course, on the way back, Moo Moo and I raced since Alina didn't wish to participate in order to protect her balloon.
Catching our breaths, I teased Moo Moo by announcing to Kyle, now in the garage working on bikes, that I won...an obvious lie. Moo Moo, now full of energy, gladly volunteered when Kyle asked for some help on the bikes- that he may or may not have really needed.
The saddest part of my day was in that garage when I realized my time at the blessed home was now up. We gathered our things and said our goodbyes.
Ainsley and I, beaming, said with pure joy in our voices, "I'm so glad we came." We never stopped smiling the whole way back to our cars, and probably a good while after.
Thank you God for Moo Moo and Alina.
Thank you God for the Cockerell boys and what you've inspired them to do.
Thank you God for Jesus Christ.
What an honor to live in your kingdom.
Thank you God for the Cockerell boys and what you've inspired them to do.
Thank you God for Jesus Christ.
What an honor to live in your kingdom.
Sunday, October 4, 2009
Saturday, October 3, 2009
Up.
I'm forwarding this blog post on. Chase Allen was a little baby boy who was born still born on Wednesday after his mother carried him for 8 months. His heart stopped beating on Sunday. In the post, "the girls" refers to his 3 expecting older (yet still very young) sisters that only got to hold their baby brother one single time.
Balloons for Chase Allen Jacobs
Chelsea has asked that I let everyone know about a very special "memorial" we are having for Chase on Saturday. The family will gather at my sister's house and release notes tied to balloons. The girls really wanted everyone to send notes up to Chase, and what better way than by balloon? Except paper airplanes, which was another request. But first Chelsea has to figure out how to get a paper airplane to fly through the clouds :)
One of Chelsea's amazingly good friends, Nicole, had the idea for friends' families to participate from their homes. How incredible! SO...
We're asking that if you are so inclined, you and your family release balloons (with notes if you'd like) in honor of Chase. We'd LOVE it if you'd take pictures of it, too! Send them to me (cassieandcompany@gmail.com) or Chelsea (if you know her email) and we will print them all off to show the girls just how many people love the Jacobs and wanted to honor Chase. What a special memory for the entire family! (AND if you have a blog, PLEASE post it and let me know about it!!)
Feel free to pass this along to anyone you think might be interested, whether we know you or not! Mark and Chelsea have been so blown away (and are SO grateful) by the outpouring of love and support. I would love for them to be blown away by the number of people releasing balloons, too. So spread the word!!
Balloons for Chase Allen Jacobs
Chelsea has asked that I let everyone know about a very special "memorial" we are having for Chase on Saturday. The family will gather at my sister's house and release notes tied to balloons. The girls really wanted everyone to send notes up to Chase, and what better way than by balloon? Except paper airplanes, which was another request. But first Chelsea has to figure out how to get a paper airplane to fly through the clouds :)
One of Chelsea's amazingly good friends, Nicole, had the idea for friends' families to participate from their homes. How incredible! SO...
We're asking that if you are so inclined, you and your family release balloons (with notes if you'd like) in honor of Chase. We'd LOVE it if you'd take pictures of it, too! Send them to me (cassieandcompany@gmail.com) or Chelsea (if you know her email) and we will print them all off to show the girls just how many people love the Jacobs and wanted to honor Chase. What a special memory for the entire family! (AND if you have a blog, PLEASE post it and let me know about it!!)
Feel free to pass this along to anyone you think might be interested, whether we know you or not! Mark and Chelsea have been so blown away (and are SO grateful) by the outpouring of love and support. I would love for them to be blown away by the number of people releasing balloons, too. So spread the word!!
Thursday, October 1, 2009
I Will Forever Be Your Bride.
When we were wed
You knew my worse
I couldn't grasp your better
When we were wed
I thought we'd be richer
You whispered, "Only through poorer..."
When we were wed
I wished away sickness
You redefined health
When we were wed
I sought to cherish and love
You embodied the two
When we were wed
I reasoned death as our start
You resonated, "From this day forward..."
When we were wed.
"I delight greatly in the LORD;
my soul rejoices in my God.
For He has clothed me with garments of salvation and arrayed me in a robe of righteousness,
as a bridegroom adorns his head like a priest,
and as a bride adorns herself with her jewels."
Isaiah 61:10
"...as a bridegroom rejoices over his bride,
so will your God rejoice over you."
Isaiah 62:5b
You knew my worse
I couldn't grasp your better
When we were wed
I thought we'd be richer
You whispered, "Only through poorer..."
When we were wed
I wished away sickness
You redefined health
When we were wed
I sought to cherish and love
You embodied the two
When we were wed
I reasoned death as our start
You resonated, "From this day forward..."
When we were wed.
"I delight greatly in the LORD;
my soul rejoices in my God.
For He has clothed me with garments of salvation and arrayed me in a robe of righteousness,
as a bridegroom adorns his head like a priest,
and as a bride adorns herself with her jewels."
Isaiah 61:10
"...as a bridegroom rejoices over his bride,
so will your God rejoice over you."
Isaiah 62:5b
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
